Saturday 31 October 2015

BUT THIS IS WHO I AM


 


 A word I have for you darling is never ever give up!
God is going to put that smile in you
Everyone says- nobody knows you better than yourself. But the truth is, even I don’t know me.
I have stared in the mirror because they say the mirror reflects who you are, still I can’t find me
Where in life did I go wrong?
I can’t even voice out my pains and bitterness
I have planned my life from birth but something somewhere is holding me back
I really don’t know what it is but I am tired of where I am.

Help me
I am frustrated
I am angry
I am sad
Worse of, everyone just thinks I know what’s best to do
I actually thought I did

Maybe if someone walks in my shoes and trace my steps they could help lead me to know where I went wrong.
Or in fact just go ahead and right my wrongs
No one knows how terrible I feel
I guess that’s the only thing I know more than anyone

I am just a cool, calm and collected person
Maybe I’m just too cool, calm and collected to a fault
But this is who I am!

Who am I to blame for being me?
Now I am trying to put my passion into other things either right or wrong because I can’t bear all the pain alone up there in my head
I hope I don’t lose who I truly am
So that when the time comes I will understand me better than anyone
And then I’ll be proud to say- no one knows me better than me.

Honestly I am trying to make my loved ones proud of me
I want to be proud of myself too
Come on!
I am trying to make you guys proud. I really am
I am trying my best. The thing is I am just tired of this spot.

And I understand that in life we just have to keep trying
So I am gonna try
I’ll just keep trying

Lets go readers! Lets help our friend

Friday 30 October 2015

I SEE THE LIGHT

I know the way

But I don't want to take that way

I'm stuck in between two worlds

Non of them value in-between

Isn't there a world of in-between?


I find myself tilting towards the "way out"

I see it clearly

I want to embrace it

But my hands are numb

My legs are stiff

There is no one on  "my path"


I feel strange

Everyone on "this path" feels great but I feel guilt

Something is just different about me

 I need the days of the old when people, I mean prophets could just walk into your house without directions and tell you what God has to say to you. Even the sinners who can't hear from God would at least have the privilege to still hear God say something.
Those act can change people!!

I want to be rescued
I see the light
I need someone to stretch out his hands and pull me out.
If my hands are numb to embrace or my legs stiff to move, Please come lift me up and I'll stand

TALK TO GOD FOR ME


Image result for Depressed


I have made a mistake
God knows this journey I won’t retake
Desperately in search to be happy
Desperately want to be laughing
I thought I will be happy.
With you I’m still trying to be happy
I want to walk away real bad
You are not what I need but you are what I want
It is not going to last forever and I’ve always wanted a forever

Everyone will be disappointed in me
Everyone may turn against me
Even I has turned away from me
Eventually I’ll be left to my own decisions

Let someone make decisions for me
I’ll take them
Or better still take them for me

I just don’t know why I can’t leave even as much as want to

I need God.
Talk to Him for me.

Thursday 29 October 2015

Pain is a Sequence


I'M SCARED TO FALL

http://f1.pepst.com/c/AA9460/798187/ssc3/home/093/cinderella-pic.n.quotes.gallery/albums/kehilangan.jpg_480_480_0_64000_0_1_0.jpg

Let's save our own friend!!!
 What more should I do? When all you want is listen to my cry. Haven't i cried well enough? Teach me how to cry and I'll learn

You wounded my heart
You tore me apart
After you conditioned me to obey your voice
You made me dance to the rhythm of my choice


Why have you done this to me
 I cant let you be
Even all the odds against you except me
But still I find myself here with you

Something in me loves my life but I'm certain its not me
Something tells me I cant lose this life, so I wont
Something believes so much in this heart I carry, so I'll carry on

I am not trying to heal my hurt
I'm not going to pray you hurt
Because I know you're less burnt

This road you led me to
Every time I turn back I wish I had thought too
I would not have journeyed this way with you
But now I'm pretty stuck with you

Now it seems like I'll fall
And I will fall really hard
I don't know who to call
I need help real bad

I don't want to fall
I'm scared to fall
 

But hey...If there is a way in then there is a way out!



Thursday 22 October 2015

Today's Quote


SONG OF AAKMON

Hey Peeps, my uncle got me excited with his piece on what love truly is. I cant help but share it with you 
          Lets read on!

Ayiki Deji's photo.


1. The Song of all lips inspired by Ayiki which is Latifah's
2. For I sought carefully and diligently within my soul for a time of inspiration, but it's a hard thing to come by these days.
3. Then I found therefore within a time space which inspiration came not beckoning unto me.
4. Then my fear multiplied, like I behold the trembling storm of a disturbed roaring ocean wave, moving against the current of my sail.
5. Though our fore faith might have been buried along side his generation in the Cave-East of Mamre, yet in that linage we found Hope.
6. Then I turned away from what seem to be a glimpse of light, for Hope is not a tangible thing as such, but that of faith-which may never be seen at first sight.
7. Then I realise that a fleshy heart is better than a vision that sees through a mountain.
8. Blessed be the day I turned against my flesh, I stripped it off naked so I could see what flows through my veins, then I accepted the followership of that which gladdens my soul.
9. And I came in unto thee and I knew thee. Within your thighs was my soul rescued, I groan to desire your sacred rose like the sands of the desert desires rain. Oh give me not oasis, for my soul longs for the deep
10. The aroma of our fellowship like myrrh and frankincense rose up within the midst of the air of the earth and showered back Gods own heritage on us.
11. Oh! How I wish time and season ends right there within you, herein I believe time ends within infinite space.
12. The hour glass adore the hand that sculpt the epitome of your being. I oppose the voice of my Shepard because I was lost in the hollow of your curse.
13. Spare me not for I do not want to be rescued by His staff, for I am living the essence of thy creation.
14. Then was my tongue lost within the valley of the two mountains. But Instead of a volcano, yours deliver unto my bosom-milk and honey spruced with a garnishing taste of lemonade.
15. Quench not my thirst with thy many words this time, for herein will my soul rest forever.
16. There is a way that seem right unto a man but the end thereof is destruction, but let it be that I am destroyed for going this way for I know that at the end of it, is my beginning.
17. When I behold the walls within which I am trapped, they were like honeycombs full of honey, the bee stings me till I lost all of me, like the flower that engulf it's insect prey.
18. Come not unto me, oh yea virgins of the land for within me you shall find no comfort, instead thorns of sorrow for my heart has been crucified in between her sacred altar.
19. And I stood to behold the works of thy hand, but my strength and my vision failed me; for my eyes has not seen anything greater-at every step you took to walk away from my presence my heart quiver with fear because of the rhythm of thy thunderstorm.
20. There is indeed no bottle worthy of keeping this wine, there are no Days in which this Sun would scourge more , there is no darker night in which this star will shine brighter than mine bottle, My day and My night.
21. In twenty one there is three and two but yes we could also say that there is that one constant me in your life. I wish I could pay your mother back in the exact coin of her labour on this very day that her kneels were down but I was thousands of kilometres away from thee still sucking my mothers breast in ignorance of what awaits my future. Blessed be the day you were conceived, blessed be the day of bended knees, Blessed be the hands that nurture you, blessed be the day I met you, Blessed be my heart that longed for thee, Blessed be the day you accepted me, Blessed be the day we both finally said "I do", Blessed be the gifts of our union and Blessed be my soul for finding a soul that is as blessed as yours. Happy Birthday My Heart, My world My Wife!
                                     By: Ayiki Ade